Miss vs. Ms. vs. Mrs.

Now it’s an interesting thing – I almost always go by Ms. in my day to day life, particularly as a teacher. However, for this blog I opted for Miss Substitute Teacher. I can’t even remember why, I think it just flowed a bit better.

What I find interesting though is how little people know about the different female titles listed in the subject heading. Men always just have “Mr.” but women have to make a choice, and even then your choice may not always be honoured. Now most of the kids who know me particularly well do address me with Ms. and many female teachers do as well. Male teachers almost always Miss – particularly older ones. Some fellow teachers hesitate though and end up with Ms. because I do wear a ring on my left finger, but because I look young, they aren’t sure. Now some women don’t care about the titles one way or the other. However to me Miss always seems to young for a professional woman in her career. To me “Miss” is best used on girls who are not yet 18. Mrs. is very much for married women. And Ms. is that in-between the two.

HOWEVER – why do women even have to change? Well the thing is it’s still left over from a previous time where it was expected. But I don’t see the need to announce my marital status to the world if men don’t have to. I think what bothers me even more is when people don’t even ask what I prefer and even worse, the don’t understand that Miss Ms and Mrs are different titles.

I mentioned I wear a ring on my left ring finger – perhaps a reason why men don’t generally approach me at random. It’s actually a sorority ring I’ve inherited and is silver and stamped with the crest. No gemstone, nothing fancy, just an imprint on a wider part of the band. Simple – and it happens to fit on that finger. On my right ring finger I wear a claddagh ring turned to show – to those in the know – that I am actually single. The reason I bring up the ring is more and more often I’m having kids notice it and asking if I’m engaged or married, then commenting on how young I look. I’ve had parents think I was a student recently when I was volunteering after school hours – or perhaps they thought I was a university student at least – they definitely were surprised to hear I was a teacher.

I find it interesting that this is still such a “thing” today. Maybe it bothers me because I am single and no where near marriage. Hard to say – but I do think the assumptions about my status, as well as the idea that it’s any of their business are what bother me most some days.


About Miss Substitute Teacher

Working as a substitute teacher. Kids really do say the darnedest things!
This entry was posted in Up on My Soap Box and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Miss vs. Ms. vs. Mrs.

  1. Mr. L says:

    I came looking for the proper way to address an envelope to a particular person. I got that, thank you. But after reading this article I decided to read a few more because you “sound” so negative here and maybe even disappointed. That theme of negativity carries over to a few more articles I read. I hope I’m wrong and that I perceived your tone incorrectly and that you are far more positive about teaching (Things That Will Distract Students) and a man’s interest in your title (this article). Take care!

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